Tuesday, May 5, 2009

I did it my way

I resisted pizza. Just now. I did that. It was easier to do because it was pepperoni and I've never cared for that stuff. However, in my mind I could see myself just pulling them off to have a slice, or two or three! See why I resisted? If I give in and have crappy food, it turns into more of a binge. I don't feel too guilty afterwards or beat myself up about it. Usually I just think I'll have to be stronger next time. But then I'm not. Or as in today, I am! So, I rejoice and pat myself on the back. What helped was that when the pizza came into the house, I had already had a big salad less than two hours prior, so I wasn't very hungry. Also, I had planned on having goats cheese and crackers after playing outside with my youngest for a while. So, while my grandfather, husband and mother sat down and had pizza and left-over soup, I had a small cup of soup and my soft goats cheese. That CHEESE, though not raw, is my lifeline. I can't be vegan at this time. I won't say I'll never get there, but for now I'm eating cheese.

Goats cheese has been known to keep me from getting a big ole cheese burger! Yep, I used to be a sucker for fast food when I wanted food fast, like getting off work or running lots of errands around town. But after I made the change last July, I had my first craving for fast food about 3 months into it and instead swung into the local organic market not sure what I was going to get. What I came out with was soft goats cheese and flat spelt crackers. As the weather got colder and I craved more comfort food, raw cheddar style goats cheese became my solution. I took a few slices for lunch during student teaching and it worked. I felt satisfied! The other teachers may have thought I was weird, but whatever.

When watching my grandfather eat his pizza and drink his Coke, I wanted pizza so badly I even told myself: What's so bad about his condition? He gets to enjoy food and he IS 86! But I answered myself with: Yeah, that's ALL he enjoys. He doesn't take walks outdoors, doesn't visit new places, doesn't go swimming, doesn't go to the beach... none of the things I want to be able to do up until my last days. I don't want each meal to be the highlight of my day.

On another note, I took G out on her tricycle. Back in NC she pretty much only rode it in the driveway and hadn't gotten the hang of steering, yet. But today we went up and down sidewalks and out in cul de sacs and she finally got steering. She got going so fast she had a tumble, so she needs to work on control before moving onto the little bicycle with training wheels. I'm proud of her.

3 comments:

Gina said...

Congrats on resisting the pizza!! I'm glad that you have some kind of comfort food that you can enjoy moderately and kind of keeps you sane :)

mommaladybug said...

So, what is raw cheese? What does raw mean in terms of food? Is raw, organic?

We need to get together sometime. This rain has kind of limited the ability to go outside, but my foot is pretty much healed so I'm okay to exercise. Give me a call!

Lauren said...

Raw means not cooked over 118 degrees... generally. For cheese, it means unpasturized.