Friday, July 25, 2008

Moving to the positive

I have been having some real problems with fatigue. I'm eating well. Trying to eat more green and fruit and whole grains. I'm succeeding. We're kinda going vegetarian around here. Mostly because we can't afford organic everything and the meat industry is so unregulated it scares me. I've been exercising 1 hour, 3 days/week. I enjoy it and would like to add more. I've been getting 8.5-9.5 hours of sleep every night! Still, when I wake up after those long hours my whole body feels extremely weak. My mind wakes up pretty well, but I just don't have the energy it seems to move my body out of bed. I stretch and move a bit, but it's difficult to get up. W has been very awesome these last 3 weeks letting me sleep in most days. Those days that he hasn't gotten up before I even realize it I know I gotta get up because he needs to sleep. But it hurts. It's gotten to be painful to even talk in the morning for the first half hour or so. It feels like too much energy. I know I have mild hypothyroidsm. The doctors say its too mild for medication. However, if symptoms are bad enough they'd give it to me. I really don't want to have to take more medication. I'm already on a good bit.

Getting up early for the Praxis tomorrow can help me jump start getting up earlier in the morning... just making myself do it. I want more hours in the day and experts say one should rise at the same time every morning no matter what day. I'm going to try. I can always make myself get up when I have somewhere I need to go, but it's harder when I'm just going to be home.

I need to be less negative. W pointed this out to me today. When I was complaining about how weak my body felt he reminded me that it wasn't good for my body to hear that. He proceded to say I have such little control over my body that it's like my mind and body aren't really connected. Well, this is something I've struggled with my whole life. I have often felt odd in my own body. I'm doing yoga to connect with my body more and other exercise classes to improve my balance and mental control over this body I have. I'm also reading Kris Carr's blog and it's really inspiring me to be more supportive and loving towards my body. This body is my ride on this planet, in this life. I'm going to start something here. I don't know what to call it but here goes:

I love myself. I am tall and strong. I will be stronger with each work-out. I will be stronger with each meal. My fingers are agile. My hips are curvy. My shoulders are broad and it's a good thing. My smile is bright. My eyes are sharp (with corrective lenses). I am healthy. I am enjoying my health. I will continue to enjoy my health.

There. No more dwelling on the fatigue. My mind believes in my body and my body will support my mind.

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